Proud to be an American

Ladies and Gentleman I would like to just tell you about my amazing 4th of July weekend.
Obviously What happens upstate stays upstate but certain highlights can definitely be used to brag about how awesome the weekend was.
First off I want to thank Joey and yaakov for lending us their houses upstate to tear into pieces and have the sickest time in the world. (also thanks to the frucht family and uncle Dave)

For those of you followers that understood my post about the MTV Rivals Challenge, I put together a similar game for the weekend pairing up a guy and girl on each team.

Pts system as follows
1st place of each event 5
2nd place 3
Davening with a minyan 3
Davening without a minyan 1
Putting on tefillin Sunday morning 2 (1 pt bonus if they are your own)
Same sex hookups - guys -20
Same sex hookups - girls 20
First girl to fart in front of guy 5
2nd girl to fart in front of guy -5
Sleeping in the other sex's house 3
Vomiting from drinking -5
Crying -5
Making someone else cry 5
Pranking someone while sleeping 3
getting pranked while sleeping -3
Being the first person to go to sleep for the night -5
Last 2 people to go to sleep 5
Getting told by jared to watch your language 1
Being called out for FOMO -1
Getting yelled at by Joey for doing something bad in the house 1
Shomer Negiah High five(both people involved) 1

Now there is Definitely an argument as to who actually won but what matters is that this was a ton of fun.

Memorable highlights

hours of basketball on shabbat, Shuffleboard, sat night BBQ at Adiras where Jared broke everything, Mud sliding in the rain, water polo in the rain, sunday night(we can leave it at that), potato launching - at night, during the day, while drunk, shooting at targets - mini keg and me hitting the lamp on first try. Raab chugging pickle juice, the ass off, many many BBQs, late night kumzitz.

I think that gets most of it, and if you want more details about what actually went down odds are you arent getting them until the videos and pics hit the web.

Til next time we take over Four Star Estates and wage war on Vacation Village with potato launchers.

Peace out

AC

Rivals

For those of you that are cool enough out there, you would have heard of the Television channel MTV. Now we all know that this station used to actually have music on it, but no all it has is trash about little girls getting pregnant and snooki and her jersey shore crew.

However there is still one saving grace for the channel and that is

The Real World.

Some of you may also remember a show back in the day called Road Rules which was incredible. But the best ever and what this post is about, is the Real World and Road Rules Challenge,(now just called the Challenge).

Basically ex castmates from the TV shows are grouped together, live in a house with each other, obviously leading to crazy drunken parties and fights, and then compete against each other in competitions for Money. Each week players are eliminated until the final episode where the winners split the prize money of their team.

This year for the 1st time, Myself and 6 other friends have gotten together to have a fantasy Draft for the this years season. This season is called Rivals, where each team of 2 members are 2 people that have previous history hating each other and sometimes have eaten gotten into physical fights with each other.

Here are the Cast members and their partners

Adam King - Chris "C.T." Tamburello

Adam Royer - Leroy Garrett

Aneesa Ferreira - Robin Hibbard

Brandon Nelson - Ty Ruff

Camila Nakagawa - Theresa Gonzalez

Cara Maria Sorbello - Laurel Stucky

Davis Mallory - Tyrie Ballard

Evan Starkman - Nehemiah Clark

Evelyn Smith - Paula Meronek

Jasmine Reynaud - Jonna Mannion

Jenn Grijalva - Mandi Moyer

Johnny Devenanzio - Tyler Duckworth

Katelynn Cusanelli - Sarah Rice

Kenny Santucci - Wes Bergmann

Our Team captains for the draft

Zshack

DJ Bickel

Raabit

Budders

JMG!

C-Dog

Lippy

Here is how the scoring of our league will take place and I will then have the draft results.

The Challenge: Rivals - Scoring System

Win a Non-Elimination Challenge: +20 (Each member of the winning team)

Get Disqualified or Quit a Non-Elimination Challenge: -5

Win an Elimination Challenge: +10(Bonus of +2 for back-to-back elimination challenge wins.)Lose an Elimination Challenge: -10(Penalty of –2 if TJ questions your effort.)

First Men and Women Eliminated from The Challenge: -20

Win The Challenge: +100 (Each member of the winning team)(2nd Place: +50; If needed 3rd +25; 4th +10)

Physical Fight (Fists or Kicks): +25(Bonus: if kicked off the show no elimination penalty.)Wrestle: +5(If it becomes a fight the points stack)

Make Someone Cry: +5 (Cab be split. If 2 people make someone cry +2 each, if 3-5 each get +1. If 6 or more then no points.)

Make-out: +5(Bonus +5 if same sex.)

Hook-up: +10(Bonus +10 if same sex.)

Nudity: +5(Butt does not count.)

Get Bleeped: +1

Prank a Sleeping or Passed Out Person: +5

Cry: -5

Vomit: -5

Quit The Challenge: -50(If due to injury only -20)

Get Pranked As You Sleep or Passed Out: -5.

If one of your people is replaced on their team you get the replacement (along with any penalties associated with the original; person leaving).

The Draft Results

With the first pick ZShack took the one and only Wes, no big surprise here

followed by DJ taking his partner Kenny.

the Raabit then took a surprising third with Johnny Bananas letting Budders Grab Evan at the 4th spot.

The biggest surprise of the whole draft came next when JMG decided to take Leroy from this past seasons real World Las Vegas with her first pick. (I hope it pays off, but just know that it wont)

I was able to grab my personal favorite next with Jenn at pick #6 and Lippy rounded out the first round the biggest man to ever play the competition in CT. not sure ho he slipped all the way to you, makes no sense but great job.

In the 2nd round of the snake draft lippy grabbed top dog Laurel and I went with a lil curve ball with Paula.

The big sleepers I give credit to DJ Bickel for somehow managing to grab Evelyn with the 13th pick and then Cara maria with 16. you made out like a bandit.

Here are the final team results

Zshack - Wes, Sarah, Camila, Davis

DJ - Kenny, evelyn, Cara Maria, Robin

Raabit - Johnny, Aneesa, Adam R., Katelyn

Budders - Evan, Tyler, Mandi, Jonna

JMG! - Leroy, Ty, Theresa, Tyrie

C-Dog - Jenn, Paula, Nehemia, Adam K.

Lippy - CT, Laurel, Jasmine, Brandon

I hope even for those of you who dont understand what the hell this post was actually about you enjoyed reading it. And if you are interested, the season kicks off this Weds night at 10pm on MTV.

PS. RIP Ryan dunn of the TV show Jackass.

AC

PPS DJ bickel you are my biggest fear in this competition, but my girls will take you down.

Who is a true Warrior????

The BEFORE and AFTER

Well as many of you know, or have heard myself and any of the other 11 people talking about over the last 3 months. On Sunday we took part in the 2011 Warrior Dash in PA.

If you have never heard of this, check out the website to get a real idea.

warriordash.com

It started off as a friendly idea, hey lets get 12 of us together and split into 2 teams and see who wins. Then after an official draft, trash talking, and even some trades, and some last minute drop outs, the teams were finally set.

The 2 teams of 6 spent time training(or at least some of us) and plenty more trash talking.

Raabs team was labeled as the front runner after what seemed to be a horrendous draft by the other team captain Aaron.

Raab with 2 ex army soldiers(himself and Matt), 2 half marathon runners(penny and adira), myself(the best self proclaimed athlete to never play a ncaa sport) and joey.

Aaron had a very unproven team with himself over working out, Aviva the most over hyped female athlete, a Pilot, An undrafted free agent in Seattle Chana, Jared who was supposed to be studying for the LSATs and Sweet Caroline.

But then came the last minute change of adding the one and Only Uri Freaking Westrich, of the Maccabaeats fame in replace of the Pilot. Now they as well had an ex soldier who also enjoys running in his spare time. Not only that, but the night before, The man himself Mr. Joseph frucht decided to twist his ankle on a 5 hour hike in the rain. As well as the fact that Raab was going to be performing straight off a red eye flight from Israel.

Suddenly the tides had turned drastically and the supposed front runners were now possibly even becoming the Underdogs.

As we arrived and started to get ready, the teams were pumped and it really was any ones game. With the time getting closer we all prepared for the 3.5 mile obstacle course run.

But none of us could have been prepared for the amount of Mud that was about to follow.

The amount of rain over the last few days, mixed with the fact that we were one of the last shifts to run, led to an extremely muddy course.

After jumping out to an early lead, Joey and Matt quickly fell behind as Joey twisted his second ankle in the MUD before the first obstacle. This allowed Raab and I to set the pace for everyone else until the 2nd obstacle when Chana and Uri snuck ahead of us while in a dark tunnel where we couldnt even see them and ended up banging my knee into a rock trying to catch them. Well done, I must admit.

For the next big chunk of the race it stayed this way, through knee high mud, balance beams, jumping over walls and under barbed wire, going through rivers it seemed the order would stay the same in the front. Chana and Uri, Raab and I, and then Jared and Aaron. All 6 of us were very close.

THEN came the giant wall where we caught up to Uri and Chana, and even passed them just to have them go right by us again when raab had to slow down. Stupid being sick and just landing from Israel. The end was close with the 6 of us all fighting to be the first group to finish, but the line at the tunnels ended up sealing the deal in that order, even after the cargo net, tire run and jumping through fire and crawling in mud under barbed wire The final six finished in that order.

Then came the waiting game for the rest of the players. We had no idea where they were, but raabs team was already down 4-2. A few minutes later we see emerging through the mud pit, Aviva and Sweet caroline and my heart dropped as I realised what this meant. We had not only lost, but were destroyed, in fact embarrassed. The unproven had become proven.

After some more time( I wont say how long after) the stragglers came in, Matt then Penny, followed by Adira and finally the man with 2 messed up ankles Joey.

For pics of what we all looked like at this point please check out Adiras facebook photos. There will also be a highlight video to follow as soon as we have time to edit it so you can all really get a feeling of what this was.

To celebrate everyone is given a free beer and then their is a concert for all to enjoy as well as Giant Turkey legs to eat. There may never have been a time where I wanted to eat non kosher more than at that moment watching everyone eat those legs.mmmmmmm.

Anyway I hope you all got a good idea of what we all went through and are super jealous that you did not take part.

Congrats to Aaron and the Black Team (although We lost more than you guys beat us) you def did win fair and square, and you deserve to feel proud.

AC

The beginning of summer

Well everyone the summer is officially here.
I will make sure to post all the incredible things that I will be doing to make everyone else jealous.

The first great summer adventure happened yesterday, when I went against all my rules and went jogging with other people. Aaron, Caroline and Myself decided to go running along the Hudson on the greenway.
Let me first say if you have never done this, YOU MUST. Its simply amazing. The view is incredible and when the weather is great, its as close to perfection as you can get in Manhattan.
After starting in the heights we had no goal in mind, just to get in shape for Warrior Dash. After realizing we had reached fairway, we were like hey wanna just see how far we can go and then just subway it back up.
Then on a crazier idea, we decided to go all the way to the UWS and go for dinner then head back on the subway. Thank god Aaron had his credit card in his shoe cuz otherwise we would have been helpless without any phones or money.
After reaching 90th street we went to Cafe Viva where we ran into some friends, and really just had an awesome day.

The feeling you get when doing such a great spontaneous run, and then spontaneous fun, is just pure bliss.


So for all those getting ready to have a fun summer just remember this key point.

Spontaneity is the key to fun. Just go for it and you will have a good time.

Looking forward to bragging about more fun things this Summer

Peace out
AC

Also I destroyed Aaron at the end when we sprinted up the hill at 90th. Sorry but I had to go there.

The chicken rapture

Hello my esteemed colleagues.
It has been quite some time since I have blessed you all my abundance of knowledge of the world. I guess I have been too focused on getting ready for the end of the world this past week that i just wasn't able to focus on anything else.
Lets discuss this VelociRapture a bit here. So some 89 year old guy in Oakland is a preacher. He studies the bible many times, and then comes up with 3 holy numbers. After multiplying these holy numbers he gets 722,500 days. SO since the day of the crucifixion that was May 21st. Now how in the world do people start believing this shit. It took me until today when I felt reborn from surviving, that it finally hit me. Us Jews do this all the time. in 2 ways. 1st - how often do we follow someones opinion that we think know the Torah more than us without questioning it. They are the Rabbis they know what they are talking about and we blindly follow them sometimes without thinking. and 2nd - ever heard of a thing called Gematria, taking random numbers and making meaning out of them.

Topic 2 - Its been a while so im gonna cram a bunch of stuff in here
The Cereal Chicken Cook Off
Some of you may have heard that this past shabbat when we were preparing to die, some of us in the heights had a cereal chicken cook off. The rules were simple.
Make chicken using cereal as a coating.
5 entries were put in
1. Cocoa Crispies and Cayenne pepper - Joey
2. Special K with strawberries - Gitzy
3. Capn Crunch with a chipotle sauce - Doueck
4. Reeses Puffs - Reina (Aviva)
5. Capn Crunch and pretzels - Yours truly

Now I have been taking some slack for my lack of creativity since my chicken was very similar to that of a certain restaurant in teaneck, but hey at least mine was edible.
Every gave a valiant effort, but some fell very very short with the chicken really not quite hitting the spot. I will leave it to the imagination as to which ones were good and which were not, but with my homemade Garlic Mayo I was able to take the crown home by a landslide vote.

Topic 3 - Free concert tickets
Lets just say im on a roll right now. Things are going my way. Last week I was notified that I got 2 free tickets to see a live performance of Brad Paisley. This was in midtown on a rooftop bar and it was a taping for the Macys 4th of July spectacular. how can I say no to that right.
Then while waiting in line we receive yellow post its(who knew how powerful these could be) Everyone who received a Post it was taken up first and put right in front of the stage to be in the cameras view. And if you think it couldn't get better, I got him to sign my cowboy hat. So far so good.
Then this week I received notification that I got 4 free tickets to the Black eyed peas concert on June 9th in central park. So if anyone is around for Shavuot and is interested in walking down from the heights with me or meeting me in central park, I am accepting bribes.
The moral of this is I hope its the beginning to a great summer of fun free activities for all(but I guess if you want a shot at these things you may want me to sign up for you)

Okay thats it for now
Ill try to keep these coming a bit more often since people have been complaining they are too bored at work..

Some light entertainment

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HBq64t5zMjE

Uncle Avi

As most of you know today is Yom Haatzmaot. Israel Independence Today. Because this year it was pushed off one day this year, it now share the same birthday as my new niece.

Thats right folks, I am now UNCLE AVI. (Sorry uncle yonah heller for stealing your thunder of coolest uncle with girls)
My Brother and sister in law have just had a baby girl.
Today is a great day to celebrate.

Drinks on me later!!!?!??!?!?!

Peace out

Uncle AC

Bootylicious

Well to all my avid readers I want to thank you for your constant support and criticism.
I will finally bless you all with a long awaited post for many.
My opinion on a girl in BOOTS.
As the summer finally begins the Boots are almost completely fazed out of a girls wardrobe, so after reading this you will be teased for the next 2 seasons until finally you can explore what I will explain to you here today.

Everyone has a different thing that they first notice when looking at someone of the opposite sex. It could be their clothes, their face, their body type, (their personality), or even their hair.
but some people like me are drawn to what type of shoes they are wearing. Not to say I am not focusing on other things, but if I am walking in the streets of Manhattan and I see 2 girls walking next to each other. One is wearing boots and the other is wearing flat shoes, I am instantly more attracted to the one in the boots. this is before I even see the face.

Now the first question you may ask, are there specific types of boots that are better than others?
Great question.
All in all a boot is a boot and all are acceptable to me. But some are better than others depending on what else the girl is wearing.
1. Uggs - many of you may think, uch gross,and most of the time you would be right but really they have their outfits that work perfectly. You always have the classic Jappy high school girl sweatpants and ugg.
2. The leather stripper boot - you pretty much cant go wrong with this one. You have the zipper ones all the way up, or the strap ones, but all are good. Just don't overdue the actual stripper outfit which may take away from it.
3. Rain boot - wats not to like. In fact this is the boot I am personally most jealous about. If it was acceptable for a straight man to wear rain boots, I would be the first one to jump on that train. It would make walking in the rain so much more enjoyable instead of ruining a pair of shoes and pants.
4. The cowboy Boot - now this one is not that common, unless your at a rodeo or a rascal flats concert, but when pulled off with a pair of cutoff jeans, I mean what can be hotter.
5. Are there any other types of boots? If so please let me know.

So ladies and gentleman, you have now learned of my boot fetish that I have.
You may think its a crazy idea but the next time you are out walking just check it out for yourself. I have changed the way many of my friends now walk the streets of Manhattan.
But just be aware to pick your head up every once in a while so you don't walk into polls, cuz that would just be embarrassing.

For all you ladies I hope you will now be aware next time your are walking in the streets and you are thinking to yourself, guys are such pigs, my eyes are up here. Really we are just checking out your Boots, not your other four letter word body part starting with a Boo.

Peace out Yall

AC